Thursday, September 8, 2011

all over again

I am getting a quilt made.  The quilt is going to be beautiful and it will be made with Jason's shirts and pants.  Today I was taping up the box so that I could mail it, and I find myself tearing up while I was taping it.  I've been through this drill so many times before...when I dropped off the engagement ring to be resized to my right hand...when I dropped off the other box that was used to make a quilt for my mother-in-law...when I dropped off yet another box that will be a quirky fun kinda quilt...when I threw away his last aftershave bottle...the many times when I gave family and friends clothing...when I took down our huge wedding picture...when I...and on and on it goes.  Nearly every time - I am driving away, walking away, marching away with every ounce of courage I have... tears running down my face.  Even now, today, 7 years later, I am struck by emotion while boxing up these final clothes.  I am crying desparately, taping the box, bewildered by my sudden emotion, yet very familiar with it at the same time.  Such a fiasco.  I get a sudden impulse to grab clothing out and keep it, yet I don't.  Taping, Crying, Taping, Crying.  I finish taping the box, and all of the sudden I realize that I cannot remember the size of his pants.  I don't know the size of his pants!  I don't have any pants left!  Now I must email the lady making the quilt and ask her to please tell me the size before she makes the quilt....
Oh this journey...God love the people who deal with me, and God Bless the quilt lady, who will no doubt kindly understand and give me his size...

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