Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Child's Eyes

I had a friend talk to me about her feelings of unworthiness.  She was being offered a particular blessing and the thoughts that the enemy kept throwing at her was that she was not good enough...that she didn't deserve the blessing...that this goodness was too much for her.

Lies, Lies, Lies.

That day coming home from work I started to pray for her and I paused to think about what I should pray...should I pray that she feels "good enough?"  Should I pray that she knows how great she is? Should I pray that her feelings of unworthiness go away?

As I was thinking about these particular ideas I realized that I was coming at this from the total wrong angle.

A blessing from God is not about whether or not we are good enough.  It has nothing to do with our worth or our performance or our abilities.  She isn't good enough.  I'm not good enough.  And neither are you.  And that's actually a beautiful thing.  We are blessed because of God's goodness and kindness.  We don't earn it.  We receive it.  OH Such beautiful, freeing grace.

And so I prayed that she would receive his blessing like a child.  As a gift.  Simply thankful to have been chosen for the blessing.

And with this knowledge, worship is the only natural response.  Worship of the one who loves us, redeems us, and blesses us JUST as we are.
...And then starts the beautiful work of making us more like Jesus.  Sanctification.

May we receive his goodness in this way.  Not tied to actions, or our past, or our present, or the labels we like to give ourselves...

but simply because of who HE, is.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."  - James 1:17

Sunday, November 6, 2016

Full House

So I'm at my dining room table. It's 8:57, but it feels kinda like midnight because of the time change. As I sit here, I have a sweet college gal from Japan doing homework at the table next to me...and I have 2 college gals from Mexico upstairs laughing and being silly. I feel like I'm running a college dormitory. I guess I kind of am running a college dormitory. Karen, Elli, Ai and I have been a little international family here on Bellecrest this month. And my house is full.

It's full of laughter and meals and stories and homework. It's full of language lessons and talking about our backgrounds and cultures. It's intriguing. It is joy. And what I continue to learn in life: Everyone has a story. Everyone.
The other evening I went to bed early and I could hear such laughing outside my door...and I just had to smile.

I am made for full. Fullness suits me. I function better in it, produce optimally in it, thrive more in it. I love cooking for a crew. I love sitting down to a meal with many around the table. I will never be that person that just retreats from everyone and goes off to live alone. It's not good for me. Together is better.

I was a little worried about sharing the bathroom with 2 other people this month.  (And I literally had to go pee in my backyard once last week).  But now... I'm sad thinking about being the only one using the bathroom next month.  I'd rather pee in the yard.
Yep - Sharing is better.

One thing do I know.  God has more up his sleeve. When Karen and Ellie leave this weekend he will bring more fullness...He always does. New adventures will come. And I will be eagerly waiting for their unveiling.

Sharing. It is good and beautiful. It is life as God meant it.