So here they are...my official NEW YEAR'S GOALS!!! I've been just plain worn out emotionally by life lately, so my goals aren't quite as lofty as usual....but valuable nonetheless :)
New Years Goals:
#1 - Eat Keystone Mac-n-Cheese every Monday without fail (unless I'm out of town) (TOTALLY ON TARGET...)
#2 - Not watch ANY Bachelorette/Bachelor or any such ridiculous POISON to my brain all year long (on target...)
#3 - Pray with serious ferver - strive less, pray desperately more (Yep - Happening...)
#4 - Find a summer job this year in order to escape depression and much crying in June (Utter FAIL)
#5 - Get piano tuned/fixed (FAIL)
#6 - Go to one international adoption information meeting (FAIL)
#7 - Try hot yoga at least once (done)
#8 - Stay committed to Coffee Emporium - drinking lots of coffee while building relationships with my friends who work there - very important. (yep - this is happening :)
#9 - Refrain from egg-ing (or any other such vandalism) of any "Peace Pole" that might exist around this city. Ignore the irony of such pole(s) and love people anyway. (hasn't happened yet - think about it all the time...kidding.)
#10 - Gather with work friends in social settings several times before summer. (okay so it's happened once...)
#11 - Succesfully complete training/coaching with the Stepping Forward Team for the Flying Pig. Run the half marathon in under 2 hours. (First Part - DONE. Second Part - not under 2, but 2:14...which is faster than last year!)
#12 - Get at least 12 massages this year (5 completed)
#13 - Visit at least 5 friends who live out of state (NOPE)
#14 - Be braver. Fear less. Risk more. (Uhmm….not really…this would require an in-depth conversation…)
Other goals:
January - Starting Jan.13, get rid of 3 things every day for the rest of the month (done), Finish The Life of Pi (done) and go see the movie (happened in February...but did see it)
February - Read one book, Go to the gym at least 3 times every week this month (Read Girl Meets God and loved it...missed the gym one by one workout)
March - Make one craft off Pinterest, Read another book (Made a Spring wreath with Rachel and Heather - the book didn't happen...I read about half of The Fisherman and several chapters in Relentless Hope by Beth Guckenberg. And then I lost both books - I think I left them at my parents' house!)
April - Travel somewhere over Spring Break, Read another book (Travelled to Washington D.C. for the IJM Global Prayer Gathering = AMAZING. Travelled to my mom and dad's house for Easter. Read the book Fields of Gold by Andy Stanley...however, I finished it on May 7th...well, it was close :)
May - Run the Flying Pig Half Marathon in under 2 hours, Eat at a fantastic restaurant (Ran the Pig in 2:14...Next year... restaurant to be completed...)
June - Get tan, Watch one Francis Chan Podcast, Go to at least one event on Fountain Square or Washington Park (Got tan. No podcast, tried to go to an event....cancelled due to rain but still romped around downtown.)
July - Continue tan, Make another craft off Pinterest, Go see one movie in the theatre, Send at least 3 people snail mail (In some ways I quit life in July...so big fat NADA on this one! - well except for the tan...yep I did that well.)
*The rest of this list will be made when I get to the summer months...at that point I'll re-evaluate my position in life and determine goals then...
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Grief and Fear
"No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear"
These are the first words in C.S. Lewis' book A Grief Observed. I have found this to be true over and over again in life - fear follows and accompanies grief so easily. Whether I've been grieving the loss of my husband, a dream, a job, my comfort, a relationship, or about anything else...I am tempted to fear. And it can be consuming. Why is it that fear is such a natural companion to grief? It's fear of the future, fear of the present, fear that things will never change, fear that there isn't a plan, and fear that I've messed everything up. Angie Smith says in her book What Women Fear, "It's so easy to fear we've ruined something beautiful." I think this is so true of women. This is so true of me.
Perhaps, the root of all of this is the fear that the best is behind me.
The best is behind me? What a horrible thought.
But when I think about those times when I'm engrossed in fear, often this thought is at the root of what scares me so readily.
The enemy loves this fear. It paralyzes and lives in complete opposition to trusting and abiding in Jesus. Sorrow can exist in communion and in abiding/trusting in Christ...Fear cannot. First John 4:18 says "There is no fear in love...."
You can be sad and trust, but you cannot fear AND trust. One or the other. Trust OR Fear. Which one will it be.?
While holding sorrow and grieving anything in life - big or small, it's imperative that I hold it, feel it, and experience it in the context of this full trust and surrender. Trusting that the best is not behind me. Trusting that the best is yet to come. Trusting that there is still life to be had and it will be beautiful.
Along with this, I believe that God is often telling me to be still and let HIM fight. Exodus 14:14 says, "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." This verse has come to my mind over and over at various times this past year, and it's not a verse that I have thought of much at other times in my life. I am a woman of action. I don't like to be idle. I am a fighter. A scrapper. Recently, though, in my relationship with Jesus, I feel Him telling me to sit back, be still, and let Him fight my battles for me. He brings me to the end of my wisdom, my knowledge, my striving and says "Ok. Now lay that all down and watch me work."
This requires a ruthless trust...and I want to have that. I want to trust that he has the answers. That he is all powerful, and will work all things for my good. That he can fix my mistakes and the mistakes of others. That he can redeem all things. That I need not fear anything.
I don't know what my life will look like at the end of this next year. But I hope - oh I hope - that I am a women who trusts more fiercely and rests more fully in the ONE who is over all things....
and knows my name.
These are the first words in C.S. Lewis' book A Grief Observed. I have found this to be true over and over again in life - fear follows and accompanies grief so easily. Whether I've been grieving the loss of my husband, a dream, a job, my comfort, a relationship, or about anything else...I am tempted to fear. And it can be consuming. Why is it that fear is such a natural companion to grief? It's fear of the future, fear of the present, fear that things will never change, fear that there isn't a plan, and fear that I've messed everything up. Angie Smith says in her book What Women Fear, "It's so easy to fear we've ruined something beautiful." I think this is so true of women. This is so true of me.
Perhaps, the root of all of this is the fear that the best is behind me.
The best is behind me? What a horrible thought.
But when I think about those times when I'm engrossed in fear, often this thought is at the root of what scares me so readily.
The enemy loves this fear. It paralyzes and lives in complete opposition to trusting and abiding in Jesus. Sorrow can exist in communion and in abiding/trusting in Christ...Fear cannot. First John 4:18 says "There is no fear in love...."
You can be sad and trust, but you cannot fear AND trust. One or the other. Trust OR Fear. Which one will it be.?
While holding sorrow and grieving anything in life - big or small, it's imperative that I hold it, feel it, and experience it in the context of this full trust and surrender. Trusting that the best is not behind me. Trusting that the best is yet to come. Trusting that there is still life to be had and it will be beautiful.
Along with this, I believe that God is often telling me to be still and let HIM fight. Exodus 14:14 says, "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." This verse has come to my mind over and over at various times this past year, and it's not a verse that I have thought of much at other times in my life. I am a woman of action. I don't like to be idle. I am a fighter. A scrapper. Recently, though, in my relationship with Jesus, I feel Him telling me to sit back, be still, and let Him fight my battles for me. He brings me to the end of my wisdom, my knowledge, my striving and says "Ok. Now lay that all down and watch me work."
This requires a ruthless trust...and I want to have that. I want to trust that he has the answers. That he is all powerful, and will work all things for my good. That he can fix my mistakes and the mistakes of others. That he can redeem all things. That I need not fear anything.
I don't know what my life will look like at the end of this next year. But I hope - oh I hope - that I am a women who trusts more fiercely and rests more fully in the ONE who is over all things....
and knows my name.
New Year's Goals 2012
Well I'd like to look at all my goals from last year and say that I met them all...however....
I lost my list of goals and therefore can't remember what they were...ooops.
I DO remember a couple, though.
#1 - Take guitar lessons. CHECK. Did it. I'm not saying I'm good at it yet, but I did take some lessons. Thank you Jon Stankorb.
#2 - Run a race at an 8:30 mile pace. CHECK. Did it. I wasn't sure I was going to make that one...I was running MUCH slower even through the summer. I decided to join a Bob Ronker's Running Group in late summer to train for the Thanksgiving Day race. My intent was to run with fast people and therefore become fast.
I must say that it actually worked.
At the beginning of the training I had to choose whether I was going to go with the "normal" group of runners and be at the front of the pack, or run with the "competitive" group of runners and be last nearly every run. I chose the latter, and it made all the difference. I would show up, leave with the fast group, and just decide that I would keep running with them until they kicked me out due to my inability to keep up adequately. I could barely talk while running with them. It was not comfortable. But at the Cyclones 5K, I met my goal and ran an 8:16 pace! Thank you Ronkers! And thank you fast people for not kicking me out of the group :)
Coming soon will be a list of goals for 2013. Please don't get excited. They will be ridiculously easy to achieve. And I might even put a goal on there that I've already accomplished so that I can start the year out feeling successful :)
I lost my list of goals and therefore can't remember what they were...ooops.
I DO remember a couple, though.
#1 - Take guitar lessons. CHECK. Did it. I'm not saying I'm good at it yet, but I did take some lessons. Thank you Jon Stankorb.
#2 - Run a race at an 8:30 mile pace. CHECK. Did it. I wasn't sure I was going to make that one...I was running MUCH slower even through the summer. I decided to join a Bob Ronker's Running Group in late summer to train for the Thanksgiving Day race. My intent was to run with fast people and therefore become fast.
I must say that it actually worked.
At the beginning of the training I had to choose whether I was going to go with the "normal" group of runners and be at the front of the pack, or run with the "competitive" group of runners and be last nearly every run. I chose the latter, and it made all the difference. I would show up, leave with the fast group, and just decide that I would keep running with them until they kicked me out due to my inability to keep up adequately. I could barely talk while running with them. It was not comfortable. But at the Cyclones 5K, I met my goal and ran an 8:16 pace! Thank you Ronkers! And thank you fast people for not kicking me out of the group :)
Coming soon will be a list of goals for 2013. Please don't get excited. They will be ridiculously easy to achieve. And I might even put a goal on there that I've already accomplished so that I can start the year out feeling successful :)
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Riding
I watched a video the other day about God. In it there was a boy riding in the back seat of a car - the windows were down, his hand was out the window, and his hair was blowing from the wind of the drive. The sun was shining low in the sky as if it were early evening, and the mood was reminiscent of childhood days from many years ago. The narrator was talking about what it means to be "home" - wherever you are...what it means to be a child of God, and to know it deeply in your soul - to feel taken care of, loved, and desired.
Something about seeing that boy sitting in the backseat of the car moved me....and I think it's because I do what he was doing so well. I am a GOOD rider...no...a GREAT rider. I love to ride with my hand out the window, my face to the sun, and my hair blowing in the breeze. I love the ride. I love not being in charge. I love getting to enjoy the scenery without a care about where I'm going or how to get to where I'm going. This is somewhere in the core of who I am.
But the reality is that I've had precious few years where that was my life. For most of my life I've been alone. Independent. This is not because it's what I desire as it may be for some. This is just because it's been my lot in life. I envy those who've had someone to take care of them since they were in their early 20's or even before. I wonder at what it must feel like to not have to think about getting the oil checked in your car....or your gutters cleaned...or how you're going to move that big piece of furniture into the house. I marvel at the people who've never touched a weed whacker, or a furnace, or a power drill. I wish that were my life...I can't imagine how it must feel to know that someone else is going to take care of it without my having to ask, inconvenience, pay for it, or do it myself. That world simply is just not mine to know.
This reality is probably why when I met my late husband, I told him "I will ride with you as far as you want to drive..." and I would've ridden with him forever. With him, for the first time since childhood, I could finally relax - because someone else was going to take care of it....whatever "it" was. I felt beautiful in that rest....like I was being who I was meant to be....giving the world a better version of myself....a truer version of myself.
The bottom line....I didn't have to be in charge anymore.
This reality is also why I remember after his death grieving very specifically that I was going to have to drive everywhere. And it broke my heart.
So when my discussion group finished the video with the boy riding in the car, we were asked how it touched or moved us. My first thought (that I of course emphatically said out loud) was "I hate driving." To which they (and I) laughed - because it really did seem horribly shallow considering the depth of the video.
However, I believe that is exactly the point.
Although there are realities to my life that are real and unavoidable - I do have to drive - to work, to church, to the grocery store, etc. I do have to mow my grass, pay the bills, change light bulbs, and decide what I'm doing and how to spend my time...
...but this DOES NOT have to be my life spiritually. In my walk with Jesus I get to ride. I get to be that little child sitting in the passenger seat with my hand out of the window; basking in the sun and the fresh air. I get to let Him decide. I get to allow Him to take care of me. My only job is to be in car....just to stay in the car and enjoy the ride. To Abide. When he turns, I turn. When he moves, I move. When he stops, I stop.
But none of this is ultimately my decision... I hear his whisper, "Do you trust me? Just ride."
This metaphor is so freeing to me. It releases my soul to rest, and it refurbishes the beauty that he has created and is creating in me. God is challenging me to trust him and allow him to be God - the lover of my soul...the one who redeems and frees me.
Make me, Lord, a woman who trusts.
I want to be a woman who has the sun and the wind in her face...and who rides.
* For the "Riding" Video, copy and paste http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQWQQ0yE7-g
Something about seeing that boy sitting in the backseat of the car moved me....and I think it's because I do what he was doing so well. I am a GOOD rider...no...a GREAT rider. I love to ride with my hand out the window, my face to the sun, and my hair blowing in the breeze. I love the ride. I love not being in charge. I love getting to enjoy the scenery without a care about where I'm going or how to get to where I'm going. This is somewhere in the core of who I am.
But the reality is that I've had precious few years where that was my life. For most of my life I've been alone. Independent. This is not because it's what I desire as it may be for some. This is just because it's been my lot in life. I envy those who've had someone to take care of them since they were in their early 20's or even before. I wonder at what it must feel like to not have to think about getting the oil checked in your car....or your gutters cleaned...or how you're going to move that big piece of furniture into the house. I marvel at the people who've never touched a weed whacker, or a furnace, or a power drill. I wish that were my life...I can't imagine how it must feel to know that someone else is going to take care of it without my having to ask, inconvenience, pay for it, or do it myself. That world simply is just not mine to know.
This reality is probably why when I met my late husband, I told him "I will ride with you as far as you want to drive..." and I would've ridden with him forever. With him, for the first time since childhood, I could finally relax - because someone else was going to take care of it....whatever "it" was. I felt beautiful in that rest....like I was being who I was meant to be....giving the world a better version of myself....a truer version of myself.
The bottom line....I didn't have to be in charge anymore.
This reality is also why I remember after his death grieving very specifically that I was going to have to drive everywhere. And it broke my heart.
So when my discussion group finished the video with the boy riding in the car, we were asked how it touched or moved us. My first thought (that I of course emphatically said out loud) was "I hate driving." To which they (and I) laughed - because it really did seem horribly shallow considering the depth of the video.
However, I believe that is exactly the point.
Although there are realities to my life that are real and unavoidable - I do have to drive - to work, to church, to the grocery store, etc. I do have to mow my grass, pay the bills, change light bulbs, and decide what I'm doing and how to spend my time...
...but this DOES NOT have to be my life spiritually. In my walk with Jesus I get to ride. I get to be that little child sitting in the passenger seat with my hand out of the window; basking in the sun and the fresh air. I get to let Him decide. I get to allow Him to take care of me. My only job is to be in car....just to stay in the car and enjoy the ride. To Abide. When he turns, I turn. When he moves, I move. When he stops, I stop.
But none of this is ultimately my decision... I hear his whisper, "Do you trust me? Just ride."
This metaphor is so freeing to me. It releases my soul to rest, and it refurbishes the beauty that he has created and is creating in me. God is challenging me to trust him and allow him to be God - the lover of my soul...the one who redeems and frees me.
Make me, Lord, a woman who trusts.
I want to be a woman who has the sun and the wind in her face...and who rides.
* For the "Riding" Video, copy and paste http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQWQQ0yE7-g
Monday, November 12, 2012
Vision
It seems there's been a theme in my life lately...and that theme is Vision. I go through periods of time when my focus is clear, there is mass purpose in my days, and I am thrilled about the adventure God wants me to be a part of...
But then I also go through times when I'm in the hum-drum of daily life. I am tired, overwhelmed, confused, and doubtful. I lose sight of the adventure. I lose sight of the passion and mystery. In those places it seems that life has clouded out his vision...and I want it back. Desperately. I want purpose beyond measure. I want adventure beyond normal. I want a life that matters, and matters deeply. I want to live beyond myself.
God is waking me up. He's been reminiscing to me that He has severe purpose in my life. He's been reminding me of the passions in my heart. He is renewing my longing to pray and seek the adventure. He's telling me that in those places where I see a need and am absolutely wrecked - in those places where I stand weeping and overcome with emotion - that GOD is in that wrecking...and he wants me to act.
I ran across a video today that touched my heart. In this idea of vision, it spoke to me about the place of sacrifice. It spoke to me about a child's heart. I hope it speaks to you too.
http://www.compassion.com/magazine/give.htm?referer=128018
All I know is that I want there to be no other explanation for my life, other than the power of God working in me.
But then I also go through times when I'm in the hum-drum of daily life. I am tired, overwhelmed, confused, and doubtful. I lose sight of the adventure. I lose sight of the passion and mystery. In those places it seems that life has clouded out his vision...and I want it back. Desperately. I want purpose beyond measure. I want adventure beyond normal. I want a life that matters, and matters deeply. I want to live beyond myself.
God is waking me up. He's been reminiscing to me that He has severe purpose in my life. He's been reminding me of the passions in my heart. He is renewing my longing to pray and seek the adventure. He's telling me that in those places where I see a need and am absolutely wrecked - in those places where I stand weeping and overcome with emotion - that GOD is in that wrecking...and he wants me to act.
I ran across a video today that touched my heart. In this idea of vision, it spoke to me about the place of sacrifice. It spoke to me about a child's heart. I hope it speaks to you too.
http://www.compassion.com/magazine/give.htm?referer=128018
All I know is that I want there to be no other explanation for my life, other than the power of God working in me.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Things I Love - Number 4
Things I Love #4 - Salsa Dancing + Fountain Square + Nathalie Hayes + Orange Slushies
Have you been to Fountain Square in the summer? Oh man, it's a serious treat - and one of the things that makes Cincinnati in the summer so fantastic. Every night in the summer, they have a particular type of event. Most nights consist of a concert...various evenings of the week have various styles of bands. It's kinda nice as you can choose the type of music you'd like to hear and head down on that night. Sunday night has a bit of a different flavor as it is movie night. A movie is projected onto the big, huge screen that's up high in the sky. That's a fun night for sure. On of my favorite nights, however, is Thursday night Salsa dancing!
At Salsa on the Square there are dancers who teach you how to salsa from the stage. I so enjoy seeing the totally random crowd of people all standing in front of the stage, uninhibited, trying to salsa dance. The dancers go step by step, teaching us various moves to try. I marvel at the fun moves. I marvel at the teachers' great legs... After the lesson, the latin band comes up to play and everyone gets down to business trying to incorporate what has been learned. There is smiling. There is laughing. There is ridiculously bad talent, many who know a little, and a few people who actually know what they're doing. Regardless, it really seems that nobody cares. There are people of poverty. There are people of wealth...and everything in between. There are Black people, White people, Hispanic people, and I believe I've even seen Indian people. I consider this one of the most diverse events in our city...perhaps THE most diverse event. I love seeing all walks of life in the same space, smiling, dancing, trying something new, and enjoying a great summer evening with friends in this great city called Cincinnati. It's spectacular.
The last time I went was with Nathalie Hayes....so why did I add her to my list of what I love? First of all, I just love Nathalie...but beyond that, I was SO thrilled to see that I had come with a friend who seriously had no inhibition to trying salsa dancing. Because she was so willing and excited to do it, we had a total blast. Nathalie has such a great ability to throw caution to the wind and just go for it. I love that about her. We did some serious dancing and laughing - and burned some calories to boot.
In addition to our dancing, we found a little shop that had some slushie machines. Talk about Jackpot! We both got an orange slushie and then sat by the iconic fountain on the square - savoring the amazing summer treat on a hot night. And then...on to more dancing.
What a fun evening?! What incredible community event?! What a great place in our city?! This is why Salsa + Fountain Square + Nathalie Hayes + Slushies ended up on my list of things I love.
You really must go this summer!
www.myfountainsquare.com
Have you been to Fountain Square in the summer? Oh man, it's a serious treat - and one of the things that makes Cincinnati in the summer so fantastic. Every night in the summer, they have a particular type of event. Most nights consist of a concert...various evenings of the week have various styles of bands. It's kinda nice as you can choose the type of music you'd like to hear and head down on that night. Sunday night has a bit of a different flavor as it is movie night. A movie is projected onto the big, huge screen that's up high in the sky. That's a fun night for sure. On of my favorite nights, however, is Thursday night Salsa dancing!
At Salsa on the Square there are dancers who teach you how to salsa from the stage. I so enjoy seeing the totally random crowd of people all standing in front of the stage, uninhibited, trying to salsa dance. The dancers go step by step, teaching us various moves to try. I marvel at the fun moves. I marvel at the teachers' great legs... After the lesson, the latin band comes up to play and everyone gets down to business trying to incorporate what has been learned. There is smiling. There is laughing. There is ridiculously bad talent, many who know a little, and a few people who actually know what they're doing. Regardless, it really seems that nobody cares. There are people of poverty. There are people of wealth...and everything in between. There are Black people, White people, Hispanic people, and I believe I've even seen Indian people. I consider this one of the most diverse events in our city...perhaps THE most diverse event. I love seeing all walks of life in the same space, smiling, dancing, trying something new, and enjoying a great summer evening with friends in this great city called Cincinnati. It's spectacular.
The last time I went was with Nathalie Hayes....so why did I add her to my list of what I love? First of all, I just love Nathalie...but beyond that, I was SO thrilled to see that I had come with a friend who seriously had no inhibition to trying salsa dancing. Because she was so willing and excited to do it, we had a total blast. Nathalie has such a great ability to throw caution to the wind and just go for it. I love that about her. We did some serious dancing and laughing - and burned some calories to boot.
In addition to our dancing, we found a little shop that had some slushie machines. Talk about Jackpot! We both got an orange slushie and then sat by the iconic fountain on the square - savoring the amazing summer treat on a hot night. And then...on to more dancing.
What a fun evening?! What incredible community event?! What a great place in our city?! This is why Salsa + Fountain Square + Nathalie Hayes + Slushies ended up on my list of things I love.
You really must go this summer!
www.myfountainsquare.com
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Things I Love - Number 3
#3 - The Flying Pig Marathon!
When I think of the things I love most about this city, the Flying Pig Marathon is up at the top of the list. And with the 5K and 10K on Saturday, in addition to the full and half marathon on Sunday, it consumes a good part of my first weekend in May each year...and my life is most definitely better because of it. This year I watched the participants of the Step Forward Team run the Saturday races...what a FUN day! It's such a joy to see people involved in these races....the sense of community, the encouragement...it is beautiful. There's something great about watching people run towards the finish line while cheering your guts out. There is something great about watching people run, push through pain, and go through a finish line....I think that will always be something worth seeing...
Not only do I love cheering on my family and friends, I am always moved by the people who complete this with disabilities. I stand in awe as I watch young boys and girls cross the finish line with physical and even mental limitations. I watch the people who do this race with them and marvel at the love, kindness, and sacrifice of these people...I love it when people buck the system - the system that says what you can and can't do in this life - the system that says what you are and aren't capable of. These people show their strength, character, and courage just by being in this race.
There is one man in particular who completes this race with a severe disability. This was not the first year it was completed by him...I saw him last year too, and I'm pretty sure, last year wasn't his first year either. He moves with a walker and an assistant. Every step is a struggle and it takes him a painfully long time to move one foot in front of the other. I've heard they allow him more than one day to work on the course, and by the day of the race, he completes the final stretch. It is beautiful. It is amazing. It's emotionally riveting. The announcer, yells for him. He is known in that race. He is brave. He is courageous. He is a hero. And HIS race, is not about winning...it's about defying the odds, perseverance, redemption...among other noble things no doubt. Our lives are better just by watching him. To Brad Fritz - thank you. You are an inspiration.
Sunday, the day of the race, comes and at 5:30 a.m. I am in the Target parking lot by my house catching a ride downtown with a few others. We arrive downtown and in the dark there are people all around - excited, milling, running, stretching, parking...the energy is unmistakable. The four of us walk towards the race, chattering excitedly about it. I stop to pee behind a dumpster (who wants to wait for a port-o-pot?), and then we head to our "pig pens", which is the spot where we are supposed to start the race. The other 3 I'm with are in an entirely different "pen" than me, so I say goodbye to them and then continue on another 100 yards or so to my "pen". I enter my designated area and wait among other excited runners to start the race. I am alone, and for a brief moment I feel some sadness over not standing with someone at the start...but then as I look around, I let go of my aloneness and celebrate the massive community of which I am a part in that moment. We are waiting in anticipation. We are excited. We are doing something that many people will never do. We are blessed. They start the announcements. A former winner speaks. A local priest prays. And once Katy Perry "Fireworks" starts playing loudly over the speakers, I can hardly contain my joy! I stand there a part of a large community, downtown in the city that I dearly love - the city to which I have been called, and in that moment I am happy. Really, really happy.
I love really happy moments.
The race was a success. The course was finished. I had a medal. And I ran it within the time I had hoped for. I am thankful. Really, really thankful.
Recap Video - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RdZkLOQ8uQ&sns=fb
This...and many more details that I did not share...is why I love the Cincinnati Flying Pig Marathon. Someday maybe you can join me on that start line.
When I think of the things I love most about this city, the Flying Pig Marathon is up at the top of the list. And with the 5K and 10K on Saturday, in addition to the full and half marathon on Sunday, it consumes a good part of my first weekend in May each year...and my life is most definitely better because of it. This year I watched the participants of the Step Forward Team run the Saturday races...what a FUN day! It's such a joy to see people involved in these races....the sense of community, the encouragement...it is beautiful. There's something great about watching people run towards the finish line while cheering your guts out. There is something great about watching people run, push through pain, and go through a finish line....I think that will always be something worth seeing...
Not only do I love cheering on my family and friends, I am always moved by the people who complete this with disabilities. I stand in awe as I watch young boys and girls cross the finish line with physical and even mental limitations. I watch the people who do this race with them and marvel at the love, kindness, and sacrifice of these people...I love it when people buck the system - the system that says what you can and can't do in this life - the system that says what you are and aren't capable of. These people show their strength, character, and courage just by being in this race.
There is one man in particular who completes this race with a severe disability. This was not the first year it was completed by him...I saw him last year too, and I'm pretty sure, last year wasn't his first year either. He moves with a walker and an assistant. Every step is a struggle and it takes him a painfully long time to move one foot in front of the other. I've heard they allow him more than one day to work on the course, and by the day of the race, he completes the final stretch. It is beautiful. It is amazing. It's emotionally riveting. The announcer, yells for him. He is known in that race. He is brave. He is courageous. He is a hero. And HIS race, is not about winning...it's about defying the odds, perseverance, redemption...among other noble things no doubt. Our lives are better just by watching him. To Brad Fritz - thank you. You are an inspiration.
Sunday, the day of the race, comes and at 5:30 a.m. I am in the Target parking lot by my house catching a ride downtown with a few others. We arrive downtown and in the dark there are people all around - excited, milling, running, stretching, parking...the energy is unmistakable. The four of us walk towards the race, chattering excitedly about it. I stop to pee behind a dumpster (who wants to wait for a port-o-pot?), and then we head to our "pig pens", which is the spot where we are supposed to start the race. The other 3 I'm with are in an entirely different "pen" than me, so I say goodbye to them and then continue on another 100 yards or so to my "pen". I enter my designated area and wait among other excited runners to start the race. I am alone, and for a brief moment I feel some sadness over not standing with someone at the start...but then as I look around, I let go of my aloneness and celebrate the massive community of which I am a part in that moment. We are waiting in anticipation. We are excited. We are doing something that many people will never do. We are blessed. They start the announcements. A former winner speaks. A local priest prays. And once Katy Perry "Fireworks" starts playing loudly over the speakers, I can hardly contain my joy! I stand there a part of a large community, downtown in the city that I dearly love - the city to which I have been called, and in that moment I am happy. Really, really happy.
I love really happy moments.
The race was a success. The course was finished. I had a medal. And I ran it within the time I had hoped for. I am thankful. Really, really thankful.
This...and many more details that I did not share...is why I love the Cincinnati Flying Pig Marathon. Someday maybe you can join me on that start line.
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